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Something needs to change

I need a vacation. Away from everything, my wife included. I need to be away from anyone that has the ability to get me annoyed or stressed. I feel like I am at the end of my patience. I seriously fear that I might blow one of these days and chew everyone on my sight, clients, suppliers of commercial patio heaters Quebec, acquaintances, friends or even more, family member.

I am about to explode and it won’t be a pleasant experience. Think of me in terms of a overheated boiler that steams up and is about to pop.

The long and stressful hours at work, the constant nagging at home combined with my lack of sleep and back pain were the main ingredients of this sublime cocktail that I have been sipping on daily from the past three months.

I am aware that I can not continue this way. Something has to change, otherwise things will go on a wrong path. I do not wish to screw up my life and end up having a heart attack before my fifties.

Problem is that I do not know where to start. Question is what to let go first? My work or my wife? Or maybe both? I am so tempted of ditching them both and leave without telling anyone where I am going.

I know that sounds like I have lost my mind. What responsible man would have act in such a way? Only a moody! Well, this moody has been dealing with too many nasty situations lately and got tired of being treated like worthless person.

I am a modest guy, I don’t need much to be happy. I can live anywhere, I don’t need fancy things or cars. I can’t do any type of work that pays me a decent amount to live freely.

While I was laying down in bed last night I asked myself why did I end up working so much? I already have a paid house and car. My income was covering my expenses. Why did I have to expand? Wasn’t I happier before? Less I owned, happier I was. Now, I am paying for my mistakes. Bigger house, more expenses, more expectations and mouths to feed as my wife keeps on inviting people over, as if our house had turned into a hotel or something similar.

Whenever I go downstairs, I see someone standing my kitchen, drinking my coffee, wearing my slippers and so on.

 

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